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Flash: Yellow Eyes

Erin Penn

Rating: Mature

The yellow eyes burned. Everyone in the room must feel them. Although the creature standing in the hatch had been motionless since the first moment humans found the spaceship, Walter swore he felt the eyes scan everyone in the tour group before settling on him.

*?*

He was in Las Vegas for a convention and decided to catch the freak show. Fifteen years ago a ship landed on some yahoo’s land in Nevada. Of course the government immediately confiscated it, but everyone in the world had seen it come in. Made the Russian meteor the year before look like a flashlight. Rather than face a world war over it, the government decided to go with common law land rights. The yahoo turned around and sold the alien ship to a casino and retired to Florida. Damn lucky yahoo.

*You/I could be so lucky.*

But not in this lifetime, mortgages were just getting harder and harder to sell as the government kept interfering. Like it was the industry’s fault the economy went into a recession for two decades.

Walter let others press by him in their urgency to get closer to the exotic. The outer rooms of the exhibit had plenty of pictures, including a personal favorite of the cock and slit hidden under the pale green short tunic the alien wore. The casino knew their patrons’ interests and got someone to lay on their back for that particular shot. He felt no need to get closer. The yellow eyes burned hot enough from this distance.

*I should move around to not draw attention.*

Must drive the scientists nuts to only have eight hours a day access without the public involved. Walter let his body start moving with the crowd. Still the nerds should be happy the alien was being treated as an international treasure; the casino was even going to send it on a world tour next year.

*The being is very attractive.*

The hair was amazing, caught back in a crystalline band clipped to the nape. Beyond the band the mammalian thin blond hair seemed to become thick reptilian feather-like fur flowing up, down and sideways as though suspended in water. The hair completely blocked the view of everything beyond the hatch with its seething frozen mass. The creature was halted midstep, about to have one of its thick white boots step onto the disembarking ramp. Its nipples pressed against the gauzy tunic fabric, firmly pointed to meet a brave new world.

*I could help free it – her – from the time statis.*

The ship could be moved in its entirety, but nothing changed about its being. No radiation emitted; no dust landed. Walter had never attempted physics in the two semesters before his drunk and flunk succeeded, but something seemed to have fixed the entire structure in the fourth dimension completely according to the outside displays.

*Our science cannot equal an alien from the stars.*

Don’t know why the geeks even try. Walter took one last look at the nipples. He could feel the puckered points rolling around on his tongue.  He felt connected to the frozen yellow-eyed alien; he also traveled and worked hard to end frustrated. Tonight, maybe with a couple of items from the wet bar, he might sit back and dream of the alien and take care of some of that frustration.

*And accept its seed.*

He never been interested in dick before, but the slit was also available. Could be an interesting experience if the girl was mobile. He ran his right hand along the ship on the way out, feeling the tingle some people had reported experiencing. Most reported the eerie feeling of their hands sliding over nothingness. Yeah, he was going to fuck Ms. Hand until the tingle spread over his whole body while thinking about the burning yellow eyes.

(words 638 – originally appearing at Sunday Fun on Breathless Press 3/10/2013 (original photo of unknown copyright), republished in new blog format 6/10/2018)

Other Cool Blogs: Magical Words March 2, 2009

Erin Penn

Image courtesy of Aleksa D at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

What is going on in their head?

“What is going on in their head?” I ask myself looking at the decisions people make and the actions people take. A lot of my writing is trying to understand other people. Some of it is trying to understand myself. All of the “trying to understand” is poured into character development. While I love worldbuilding, character development – understanding people – is why I write.

David B. Coe holds up “The Imperfect Mirror” to himself for a glimpse to understand an aspect of why he writes. In his March 2009 blog post, he explores how the Point-of-View (POV) characters in his various series match his own personal age when he conceived and wrote the books. For him, character development is about exploring the questions of life and the interactions with others. Aging and life changes realign the questions most interesting to him.

What is going on in your head, below the surface, when you write characters?

To see the whole post (and comments) go here: http://www.magicalwords.net/david-b-coe/the-imperfect-mirror/

Book Review: Were- (an Anthology)

Erin Penn

Book Cover from Amazon

Were-, an anthology published by Zombies Needs Brains, LLC.

BOOK BLURB ON AMAZON

Werewolves rule the night in urban fantasy, but everyone knows there are other were-creatures out there just as dangerous and deadly, if not as common, each with their own issues as they struggle to fit into—or prey upon—society. What about the were-goats? The were-crows and were-wasps?

Here are seventeen stories of urban fantasy by today’s leading science fiction and fantasy authors that introduce you to some of those other were-creatures, the ones hiding in the dark background shadows, waiting to bite. Join Seanan McGuire, Ashley McConnell, Susan Jett, Eliora Smith, David B. Coe, April Steenburgh, Gini Koch, Mike Barretta, Elizabeth Kite, Danielle Ackley-McPhail, Jean Marie Ward, Katharine Kerr, Sarah Brand, Anneliese Belmond, Faith Hunter, Patricia Bray, and Phyllis Ames as they take you into the hidden corners of our world to see some lesser known were-creatures. You may want to bring along some silver … just in case.

 

MY REVIEW

Normally I give anthologies four stars, because while one or two stories are standouts, usually I run into a couple clunkers as well. I loved all the stories in Were- – most of the stories created solid worldbuilding in a few short strokes. 

Avoiding the ubiquitous werewolf, Were- follows the dozens of other shifters of folklore and urban fantasy: weregoats, shape-shifting unicorns, young children-cubs, murders of were-crows, were-plants. … Yep, were-plants … and many more things which will make your skin crawl or, maybe, shift.

The stories and writing style varied as much as the were-creatures – from detective noir to superhero. A+ read!

Best in Show by Seanan McGuire – Detective noir sent to a cat show.

We Dig by Ashley McConnell – Worldbuilding with miners and historical industrial (and racial) issues.

Eyes Like Pearls by Susan Jett – You never forget your first holiday crush.

Among the Grapevines, Growing by Eliora Smith – Were-plant.

A Party for Bailey by David B. Coe – Children bite, and momma bear really should keep her cub closer to home.

Cry Murder by April Steenburgh – Age old issues of crows versus owls.

Missy the Were-Pomeranian vs. the Masters of Mediocre Doom by Gini Koch – Wonderful superhero snark!

Paper Wasp by Mike Barretta – Who put this back to back with Missy the Were-Pomeranian? Really the whiplash between the upbeat superhero story and this horror one is mind-blowing. After all the light and joy building from A Party for Bailey, to the family vibe of Cry Murder and pure fun of Missy vs. the Masters, Paper Wasp stings deep. 

Well done editors with the pacing of stories funny, sad, scary, and thoughtful.

Point Five by Elizabeth Kite – Email format writing style and an amazing “if this, then this would happen” worldbuilding.

**Usually about here in anthologies, things start to be the second stringers. A reader feels like they got their money worth and is willing to try a couple new authors who are learning the craft. I swear, in this anthology, things got even better after the half-way point.**

The Promise of Death by Daniell Ackley-McPhail – Unicorn without a horn.

The Five Bean Solution by Jean Marie Ward – I’ve read the first short-story about these characters in a different anthology and this one is even better. The characters and POV character’s voice in the story are nicely nuanced.

Witness Report by Katherine Kerr – Historical were- story.

Attack of the Were-Zombie Friendship with Benefits by Sara Brand – Another worldbuilding twist – when it is no longer safe to go out at night, how does the night-scene teenagers and early-twenty adjust? 

The Whale by Annelies Belmond – Even humans unconsciously recognize the majestic and tragic hidden in human form. The worldbuilding of Weight-bound gives an entirely different approach to shifter/were- relations and activities. I would say this one was my favorite short story, except I want to say that about a few others as well. I will say this is the most original in a collection of very original material. A must-read.

Anzu, Duba, Beast by Faith Hunter – A story from the Jane Yellowrock world.

Shiftr by Patricia Bray – Again with the worldbuilding. If you have “this” then “this”. Love the apps – from hook ups to family tree to DNA investigation.

Sniff for Your Life by Phillis Ames – If you like rats, this short is a must-read. Big alpha werewolf needs a nose even more sensitive than a canine’s to save the city.

Flash: Dismount

Erin Penn

Image courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Rating: Mature

Charlotte gave old Rowan his head and together they chased the wind back to the homestead. Eight years at University, but she had a sheepskin on the wall declaring her a veterinarian. Still, far too long wrapped up in concrete and metal. She was a dirt, wind, and rain girl.

Breathing hard, the horse and rider team pulled up to the barn. CB, the foreman, had been watching their solo race and came over. Charlotte inspected him from high on the horse while he approached. He was a fine piece of man; years of ranch work defined every muscle and carved sun-wrinkles into his chiseled face. Pushing thirty-five to her twenty-seven, he had been a fixture at Double Bar T since her teen years. He hadn’t been around when she returned earlier in the week.

“Branding all done cowboy?”  Her broad smile welcomed his company.

“Yep,” CB patted Rowan’s neck, holding the old stallion steady while his boss’ daughter dismounted onto the fence. “Got a good calfing this year out on the edges. About half again last year.”

“That should help pay off some of my loans.”

One of the hands ran over and took the reins, walking the horse to cool it off. Freed, CB came over to where Charlotte sat. He craned his head slightly to watch her, a rare instance of looking up at her. “It’s my understanding, miss, you didn’t need no loans because of your scholarship and all.”

Charlotte took off her Stetson and swatted him on the shoulder. “Don’t contradict a lady. Have you learned nothing?”

A deep chuckle rumbled out of CB. “When I meet a lady, Miss Charlotte, I promise I won’t argue with her none.” He gripped her by the hips..

“Why you insolent…” Charlotte’s voice trailed off. Her hands initially steadying herself on his broad, strong shoulders clenched deep into firm muscles as CB pulled her closer. She had been expecting the typical lift and set down as they continued to banter.

Instead he first lifted her high, bringing her hips directly in contact with his chest. Holding her dead weight at an awkward angle, in a manner no city boy could ever hope to no matter how much gym time he had, CB then drew her down the length of his body effortlessly.  She felt every bump, muscle, and sinew as their bodies slid against each other.  Her nipples hardened and pushed against her plaid cotton shirt. His lips brushed them like a cloud’s touch tightening them further, begging to be sucked through the old fabric. He pressed her hips firmly against a significant bump just past his belt buckle and then her feet were on solid ground.

Fortunately CB did not let go immediately, as her ability to stand steady had been destroyed. She swayed into him, remembering for a moment her seduction using soap and water. She had initiated a physical relationship with him between her freshman and sophomore year. Every summer until she started the practice labs during the doctoral program, Charlotte had managed to wiggle her way back into his bed. Three years had put enough distance that she remembered the affair fondly, forgetting the fire they ignited in each other.

“Hey you, what do you think you are doing?” A new voice yelled across the corral.

Charlotte jumped guiltily away from CB. The huffing man, in new dark blue jeans and Western shirt still sporting its packing creases, closed the distance quickly. CB raised an eyebrow towards Charlotte.

“Justin, I don’t think you have met our foreman, CB McCarty. He was helping me down from the fence. CB, may I introduce you to Justin Emmet, my fiancé?” Charlotte bit her lip, her brown eyes clouded with worry.

(words 623 – first published 12/14/2013; republished in new blog format 6/3/2018)

Blog: Ah-Ha and the Three-Act Play

Erin Penn

Ah-Ha – Take On Me video: A study of the Three-Act Play

Yet another blog on Ah-Ha’s Take on Me video. Previously I have discussed Agency and Point Of View (POV). Now let’s review the video from the three-act story structure. Who would have thought a pop video had so much depth? There is a reason it swept the music video awards around the world the year of its release. Far more than a bunch of dancers or swirls of video images inspired by musical notes and poetic words, the video presents a full story covering multiple genres of superhero fantasy, action-adventure, and romance.

The generally accepted three-act structure for fiction is as follows: Setup, Confrontation, and Resolution.

During the Setup we are introduced to the location, the characters, and the nature of the story. In quick succession the video introduces us to the real-world diner and the four-panel art of the black and white comic book. We meet the heroine, the waitress, and the hero, plus the placeholding characters of the other musicians, the diner patrons, and the cook. The placeholders are what I call scenery characters. The heroine is pulled into the comic world (in the INCITING INCIDENT from which all other events follow) continuing the setup by letting the viewers see how the two characters interact with each other.

Act Two, Confrontation, starts with the first of the series of obstacles and ascending action. As Liana mentioned in her blog (you can find the link from HERE), for a thriller or action story villains should build to increase risk. And this story has its share of ever-increasing dangerous antagonists.

First of the obstacles/confrontations is the waitress. The first of the villains. As allowed, the first villain may not be the real villain, and may become an ally later. In this case, justly angry she crumples the comic world and throws it out. The confrontation isn’t strong, but breaks the watcher away from the fantastical actions of the transformation into the comic world and the comfort of a destiny-driven romance with the anger and destruction set in the real world.

The second obstacle/confrontation are the drivers who hunt the lovers through a crushed world until a dead-end prevents further retreat. From the displaced danger of the waitress, the story has shifted to a more immediate and rushing action of the fantasy world.

Second act midpoint is reached and the twist is introduced. The transformation into the comic world can be reversed. The woman is returned to the real world. But the male is still a two-dimensional character and unable to follow her. He faces the obstacle left behind.

Now here it becomes interesting from a dissection of writing analysis. Even though the stakes have lessened, the woman no longer is in danger, the emotions ramp up because now we have returned to the real world. The danger escalates again because we are back to full-color real-world. People looming, disorientation, bruises and injury from the last encounter becomes visible, and the only thought is escape.

Disaster exists just behind her; her hero did not follow her. The third and final villain is introduced – fear … and death.

The writer became cruel here, allowing us a moment to breathe when she returns to her apartment. All the previous obstacles have disappeared – the waitress has been avoided, the black & white drivers dodged, and the diner escaped. Only one obstacle remains. The true obstacle from the very beginning; the lovers are from different worlds. So we the viewers, our hearts just barely stopped racing from the second-act climax, join her in the Third Act, the Resolution.

In the third-act, we bleed with the character we have come to know from the previous two acts of set-up/introduction and confrontation/obstacles when she turns the page and discovers her hero has been left for dead. She cannot reach through to his world to touch him, to feel the pulse, verify if he is alive…if he ever was alive.

Then a crash and the final twist is introduced. The hero starts trying to cross over into her world through the frame of a doorway. The denouement, climax of the chain of events, has him throwing himself, injuring himself further, trying to reach her world. For some reason (never discussed) crossing from a 3-D world into a 2-D world is much more simpler than forcing a 2-D black and white being into the 3-D full-color real world. But for her, he tries, killing the parts of himself left alive by the drivers.

Wrap-up in the third act has the heroine running to the hero once he joins her in the real-world.

The video is amazing because it not only has an action plot, but an emotional plot. You can follow the growing relationship between the main characters throughout. The woman decides to “take on” the man in his world; and he decides to “take on” the woman in hers. By the end of the story, you know they are committed for life. The screenwriter used ascending and descending action to increase the emotional involvement of the watcher.

WRITING EXERCISE: Find a short video or commercial which struck you as having a full story and analyze for three-act structure, POV, and agency. Think about why the commercial/video works and what you can steal for your writing.

READING EXERCISE: Read a short story. Does it follow a three-act format (Setup, Confrontation, Resolution)?