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Blog: Ah-Ha – A Study in POV

Ah-Ha – Take On Me video: A Study in POV

I previously blogged on the Ah-Ha video “Take on Me” in June. You can link to it HERE.

As mentioned, the story presented in the video resounds in me decades later. I use it for my “wake-up” alarm to go to work, encouraging me to take on the world and make a difference.

One of the interesting things about the video is the switching point of views (POVs) for the story. If you have been having problems picturing the differences between first and third POV, dissecting this video may help.

The opening starts with close first-person POV of the heroine. We glimpse her world in the diner, her reading the story for escape from the ho-hum, and her reaction to the hero breaking the fourth wall of the comic to invite her into his world. We see them fall in love. We don’t know why the male choose her or how he had the ability to reach out. That information is not available for her POV; at this point the story has all been about her and what she can see.

Now we switch to third-person omniscient. We return to the real world for a few minutes. The waitress discovers she has been left without the check paid. We see her react but don’t really identify with her as a person – only as a role. Omniscient has that effect; seeing the whole world keeps one from being emotionally drawn in. Next the third-person switches to the other drivers noticing the intruder to their world. The omniscient lets the viewer know what is happening and why, but not necessarily what the main characters are experiencing emotionally.

Initially the POV seems to have returned to the heroine, but it doesn’t actually. The running away, the music being played, etc. could be either first-person or close third-person. But then the hero saves the woman by returning her to the real-world. If we were in first-person heroine, we would not know he turned around to face the bad guys. This one panel lets us know what POV we are in. The switch to close third-person allowed us to know what is happening with both the main characters. The editor in me doesn’t like the amorphous POV at this point – it works for the video but if I ran into it in a story, I would ask the writer to more clearly define the POV. No head-hopping!

Back in the real-world we return to the woman’s first-person POV for the third-act of the story. We see the looming diner population, experience the fear and uncertainty overwhelming our heroine, and initiate the immediate reactions of rescuing the comic and running for her life. For a few seconds the video totally grabs and pulls a watcher in just like the black&white-sketch hand did with our heroine at the beginning of the video.

At her house, the pounding heart slows as she smooths the paper … and finds him dead. Her POV continues when she hears the crash and sees her hero throw himself out of his world into hers.

Would the story have worked if it remained 100% first person or third person? How would the story have changed without viewing the waitress’ actions or the male turning around after our main POV character left?

WRITING EXERCISE: For your present WIP, think about how you have used POV. Have you been consistent in usage? Would letting the reader know the antagonists actions help the story or decease surprises later on?

READING EXERCISE: Think about your most recent read. Was the POV consistent? Was there anyone else in the story you could have “followed” through POV and still have seen most of the story?

Writing Exercise: Writing Prompts

Image: Mark Lewis “Brave” – http://www.flickr.com/photos/83008453@N00/127143656
Prompt: Jana Wilson “Thinking Out Loud” –

Prompts

Writing prompts are great for beginning writers. My participation in a monthly one through (the now defunct publishing company) Breathless Press is how this blog started. Prompts come in many flavors, but two major categories: visual and verbal.

Based on a picture of some sort, visual prompts inspire a story through the eyes. The story may be based on the picture or just inspired by it. My recent “Glow” flash is based on a visual prompt from a writing group.

Verbal, or text, prompt come from words. Sometimes the requirement is to fit the words into the story and other times they just inspire. From the same writing group, I received a text prompt which resulted in “To Do List“.

Where might published writers be driven by prompts?

Anthologies are often theme-based, basically a verbal prompt. A couple upcoming anthologies include: Love and Bubbles – an anthology of romances which take place UNDER the sea (due 12/20/2017) – and Other Covenants – Alternate History involving the Jewish people (due 2/4/2018).

Visual prompts may come from being handed a picture to be the cover for a magazine and being told “Write something for this.” During the pulp fiction years, picture-driven stories were common as western, sci-fi, and fantasy magazines bought the rights to paintings.

Using prompts to prime the pump, get practice in writing, or just take a break from a long-form story can be fun.

WRITING EXERCISE: If you are part of a group which recently issued a writer’s prompt, write that story. Otherwise on a google search type in either “Writing Prompts” or “Writing Prompts Pictures”. Write a story of at least 200 words based on the result. If you want, post the results below including a link to where you got the prompt.

Flash: Death Wish Part 1 – Hair Drop

Rating: Mature

Pietro leaning against the wall outside disturbed me when I opened the apartment’s door. I was about to go to sleep when I heard the knock.  I hadn’t seen him in two months; he always took off the summer from the gas station – convenience store where we pulled third shift. The boss didn’t mind, as summer had plenty of high schoolers to abuse. I figured he had a gig at the shore, but Pietro was looking far from tan.

How did he know where I live? Took me a moment to remember I had invited him over for my new year’s party. He showed up late and left early since he was covering work that night.

God, he looked yummy. We had started grabbing quickies in the back during restocking; hence inviting him over for a party.

God, he looked awful. I knew I was staring at the shorter man, but he had knocked and I still didn’t know why he was here. I didn’t remember it raining, so why was his hair soaked?

Then a drop of liquid fell from his hair to his white T and formed a bright red spot. My eyes suddenly saw his shirt was covered in the red dots and his denim jeans were more black than blue from something other than dye.

I took a step back to close the door when suddenly he was through it, his bloody hand covering my mouth.

“Shush, shush, shush. I am so sorry. I really am. I am sorry.” He muttered using his foot to close the door behind him. “I didn’t have anywhere else to go and the sun is up. Hell, I am so sorry.”

The squeaky toy kind nearly wrecked the ominous mood; Pietro grimaced as he glanced down. Well, may have wrecked what he was creating – but it added a whole other level of fear to me. I tried to take advantage of the broken eye contact to move away, get his hand off my mouth. Anything so I could scream or fight.

“Quiet.” He said and the word echoed through my head cutting off my voice just as the scream was about to break away. Looking again at the toy, he asked “Are they here?”

I nodded as tears rolled down my face. I kept trying to back away from him.

He slowly inhaled as he cornered me against the couch. How had I never noticed the man didn’t breathe? “Where will you like them to be taken?” he asked as he pushed my six foot frame onto the soft surface.

I refound my voice. “Don’t hurt them. Please don’t hurt them.”

“They will be safe. Where do you want them to go?”

God, I should have made a will. But a convenience store income isn’t exactly something you think about dividing. I forgot my most precious possessions also needed assignment. “Not their mother. Please keep them away from their mother.”

He looked at me in the eyes again, his pupils expanding to fill the white. “Any other family?”

I shook my head, unable to look away. His eyes were like a bird’s. A baby bird with its constant hunger, mouth gaping. An adult bird, who remembered that constant bone deep hunger. I wanted to feed it. I needed to feed it. I adjusted my legs as I grew hard. Looking into those black eyes, I knew much of the blood on him was his. He was hunger itself.

”Just take care of them.” I panted as he approached dragging his hand up my leg, over my boxers and finally to my neck. “And don’t ever let their mom have them.”

“I will do what I can.” He swore just before he bit down.

(words 624 – originally appearing at Sunday Fun on Breathless Press 11/25/2012 (photo for the prompt of unknown origin so not copied); republished in new blog format 11/26/2017)

Other Cool Blogs: Civilian Reader August 1, 2017

Photo by Jens Lindner on Unsplash

Plans Change

“But-but-but…,” I stare at the screen, “You are not following the outline.”

The character looks back at me, smirking, “You want real characters, then we get to decide our own actions.”

Book Cover for Honestly

In Honestly, I had carefully set up a sexy encounter in the laundry room. And I waited, and I waited. Nothing happened. Eventually, Kassandra and Troy take Troy’s laundry down to his room. Whatever. I just kept typing. Suddenly, when I – the writer – have forgotten about things and Kassandra starts up the stairs again Troy stops the story.

“But…you…grrr….(sputter unintelligible things)” and then I typed.

The reason that scene is so organic is it just happened. I didn’t write it. My characters did.

Joshua Palmatier discusses the issue of the characters running off with story in a guest post on Civilian Reader. He had it much worse than my little hiccup. They didn’t change just one scene, but the whole final book of a trilogy to the point he needed to talk to his editor because the book he was writing wasn’t the book he sold them.

Important take away: “…if the characters don’t at some point take control and do unexpected things, then the book isn’t succeeding.

Author Spotlight: Sarah M. Anderson / Maggie Chase

Amazon Cover

One of the marketing questions every author needs to ask when they change their primary genre, is should they go with a pen name or keep their primary name or work with somewhere in between. Sarah M. Anderson writes contemporary western romances, but wanted to create an erotica historic series set in the west. How to go about it? If she completely separates them under different names, she would need to create two web-presences, or only market one of her “people”. If she didn’t create some separation, the series where she explores MMF, FF, BDSM, and other non-Harlequin topics, some of her regular readers will feel betrayed buying the book unexpectedly. So she set up a alternate name, but provided a clear window between the two. The Maggie Chase cover indicates her primary writing name, and her website has her Maggie Chase personality under a tab.

And when I went there – Good Grief! My name is there too because of my Goodread reviews of her books:

That was unexpected. I read a lot of books and review a lot of books on Goodreads – I cherry-pick from the 120 plus reviews I do in a year for the twelves I publish here. (I have over 400 reviews posted on Goodreads at this time.)

This particular quote comes from my review of His Sapphire, the BDSM book of the series.

Ms. Chase has created an amazing cast of character for her Jeweled Ladies’ series – each with different needs and wants. Each talk differently and have different goals. And – this is extremely rare – some of those goals are at cross-purposes! Usually everyone in a series are all good, likeable people in a circle of friends with similar goals. This series is set in the wild west with politicians, and freed slaves, with ladies of the night, and ancient feuds. One of the most amazing erotica series I have ever read.

If you like erotic romance and want something wild-west western, look into this series.