Flash: Blue Jeans Guy

Image from freedigitalphotos.net

Rating: Mature

Hmm. This virtual reality just got better. I wasn’t sure what I was getting when I picked up “Blue Jeans Guy” from the romance section. I mean, everyone KNOWS what they are getting from that portion of the romance section, but you never know if the AI … REALLY … understands your preferences when moving things into your recommended queue. “Red Hat Man” had been a disaster.

But Blue Jeans Guy, just what the doctor ordered, though I don’t think the Psych Doc shares memory storage with the Entertainment AI.

I guess they would, healthy mind starts with a happy mind and entertainment makes you happy.

Is he just going to stand there, fists ready to unsnap his jeans, a set of abs I want to climb like the Rockies?

(By the way, if you haven’t tried the Rockies Sim, and you like hiking and rock climbing, highly recommend – five stars. I don’t know if those towering monsters are real, but boy are they beautiful.)

As beautiful as this boy.

“Hey, do you want to take those off, or put on a shirt?” I ask the virtual.

Whatever you want sweetheart. It says back, the voice sounding distant.

Oh, crap. I’m still thinking too much. I haven’t fully immersed.

What can I say, it had been a rough day.

Reaching up in the VR suite, I tell it to drop some critical thinking blocker into the IV so I can better experience things. Can’t be too on my toes if I want to enjoy having them sucked.

(Quick check, no, Blue Jeans Guy is not set up for foot fetish. Drat.)

“I would like them off big guy.” I lean back on … I look around … a bed covered in pillows. Soft as a dream. Literally.

The author programmed the pillows for a pretty good mix of colors…oooo, nice colors, the fabric just went from soft to exquisite.

I look over at the man in the bedroom with me.

“Hey hon.” I crawl to the edge of the bed. “Come here.”

He approaches, kicking off his shoes and pulling off his socks.

Good, I love a man in bare feet.

I spend too much time in clothes and shoes … and I don’t need to be thinking about that with … “Hey hon, you got a name,” I say, gripping his shoulders as I kneel tall on the mattress to start tasting his neck.

“What sort of name do you like?”

Ah, hell no. I hate it when someone is lazy programming and doesn’t bother supplying a name.

“Whatever you want hon.” I draw his face over for a quick kiss. “Be imaginative. I need something real today.”

The virtual freeze, his eyes glazing over. Well, on a normal human the eyes stopping tracking and the face not moving would be considered a glaze over, here it just means processing. Basic writing should be able to search for a name with the parameters I just gave, if the writer had any skill.

One time a blue circle appeared, replacing the face. I exited that VR so fast, electrons burned. I told the algorithm never to send me anything by that author again.


I raise an eyebrow. “Really?” I say dryly.


“Better, I can work with that.”

I reach for his pants and unsnap them.

“I rather you work with this.” He takes my hand inside his pants.

“Don’t worry. I’m going to work with everything you got.” I start falling backwards on the sheets, pulling Randall the Blue Jeans Guy with me. “Tell me you love me.”

“I love you Officer Bahn.”

“Sh, sh.” I press my finger against his generous lips. “In the bedroom, I’m K.B., think you can handle that?”

“Yes.” He cups my breast, his mouth covers my nipple, causing me to arch into the sensation.

It seems I’m already naked. Okay then.

(words 650; first published 11/22/2023 – created during two ten-minute writing sprints (then a proofing pass) – total actual time about an hour including upload)