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Editing Rant: Timeline

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Love this story. Wonderful … wait, what just happened? During the morning the person was caught in rush hour, but evening she is surprised when people are working on a Sunday? Oh, and a secondary character just flew home after a long weekend. Early morning has rush hour just about one hour past dawn a nice solid 8:30, but evening rush hour is long past though it is just sunset, and since it is late autumn in the story that makes it about 5:30 pm? Why no rush hour at 5:30 pm?
TIMELINE folks are your friend, and they are not just for thrillers anymore.
Anytime you have a countdown … a letter arrives saying a visitor arrives in four days, a child is kidnapped and given 48 hours to find, or a person comes back after four weeks away … make sure these work. Your readers don’t need to know the countdown to the hour (or minute depending on how tight it is), but you should. And if daylight versus nighttime hours apply keep track of the time of year and how many daylight hours actually exist. Is it the 14-hours of summer or the 9-hours of winter, or equinox of 12 hours for the spring and fall? Are tides 24-hour apart or 12?
Timeline, seasonal, daylight hours. Everyone understands the passage of time and it is one of the fastest things to throw readers out of the story when the fourth dimension is ill-defined.
I can go on and on about this. It is a common issue. Make a timeline, because the rewrite tends to get extensive. I usually just put in comments with “TIMELINE” notes over to the side during the editing phase to make certain everything lines up.
Flash: Old Dragon

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[Old Dragon – flash story]
“So, grandpa, what was it like back in the days of dragons and knights?” The young man had superior air about him. Ancient and venerable, history and honor, these no longer had value to him. He wanted to bait me, belittle my accomplishments. He passed me a heavy stick; thick as his wrist. I needed both hands to steady the weight.
I admit my days of glory were not yesterday, or even the day before yesterday. I like the comfort of the community hall and earned my keep by keeping the fire burning, feeding it with twigs and sticks the young things brought as gifts for the next story. I fed his branch into the fire, the flare of heat pushed back the cold and arthritic pain.
“I first saw a dragon when I was eight, nearly nine. I was gathering wood, being the lowliest and youngest of Sir Egil’s squires. I erroneously thought of myself higher than I was and was complaining the whole time to Windflyer, the warhorse I was tasked with excising that day.”
I pressed a cup to my lips wetting them. Under my eyelashes, I watch the boy lean forward unconsciously. Two or three children, tiring of carding wool for the spinners, gathered at my feet. They made slight rustling noises as they settled. I waited patiently, but my hopeful tormentor, eager to prove his early manhood superiority, was as uncomfortable with silence as most his age, gave me power when he asked “So what happened?”
“The horse, the smallest, fastest, and steadiest of the three horses my knight kept in the lords’ stables, had been difficult to push into the hills that night. He had been so unlike his normal self, I tethered him as I gathered wood and loaded the sled. A good thing too, otherwise I would have had a long walk that night and things would have been very different around here.”
One of my miniature audience could not contain his excitement. “Because he would have run away.”
“Aye, Barry. Windflyer would have been safely home before I had taken three steps.”
The young man, Talar, leaned against a chair. He was new to our town, a tradesman establishing a laundry using machines we had never seen before.
“And I wouldn’t have blamed him…Because the night screamed.” I stabbed a finger towards my stick provider. “Have you heard a wildcat scream in your travels? The bloodcurling sound that travels up and down your spine, somewhere between a human scream and something…else?”
“Sure. Are you saying it sounded like that?”
“No.” I waited, staring at him until he shifted just a little. I watched his eyes search the room as he tried to process my flat response. He slipped into the chair fully. Just before his next question came, I filled in the silence “The sound is as different from a wildcat as a wildcat’s from a chicken cluck. A wildcat may sound unnatural, but a dragon IS unnatural. The scream tears your spine in half with shivers. Every part of my body insisted I had to run, run away, and no part of my body could move. My ears burned. My eyes watered. My breath stopped.”
“Then I saw it. A shimmer of night destroying trees with a leap. It climbed through the air, clawing and scratching. The heavy form pulled from ground to sky by sheer willpower for nothing that huge should fly. I felt empty air hit me like blows as it fled the horrific presence. A black shadow cut a hole in the starry sky, widening it and widening it. Absorbing all light in a path towards the lord’s castle. Blocking all sound but the beating and pounding of wings against helpless air.”
(Words 627; first published 1/24/2014; republished 1/6/2019)
Other Cool Blogs: Magical Words Feb 11, 2008

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Authorship is a solitary task, except when it isn’t.
This makes for a dichotomy of skill sets – one, the ability to spend hours and hours alone with the voices in your head, and the other, hours and hours in the middle of the crowded floors of conventions networking with fans and associates. For many introverted writers, the second skill set a work in (non)progress in desperate need of development.
Being around others is uncomfortable. For some writers, it is shyness. For others, fear of people finding out their hacks (not that the author is a hack, just one of the voices in their head says they are – Note, not all the voices in authors’ heads are marketable characters. They have all the normal voices people have (good and bad) PLUS potential books). In my case, I hate to be a bother.
So how can one overcome the discomfort? Faith Hunter suggests an excellent path – write your way out of it!
See the full post here: http://www.magicalwords.net/faith-hunter/part-twodifferent-subject/
Book Review: Greatshadow: Book One of the Dragon Apocalypse

Book Cover from Amazon
Greatshadow: Book One of the Dragon Apocalypse by James Maxey
BOOK BLURB ON AMAZON
A classic sword and sorcery dungeon crawl to hunt a dangerous dragon!
After stealing a priceless relic from the Church of the Book, Infidel is the world’s most infamous mercenary. Now she’s got her eyes on a new prize, the fabled treasure trove of the dragon Greatshadow. Joining forces with a band of dangerous rogues, can she survive her own allies long enough to face the dragon?
MY REVIEW
The world creation of the primal dragons is great. I love why they became what they are and look forward to future books of the Dragon Apocalypse. The three systems of magic ruling the world (blood, weaving and dreams) plus the multi-religious powers with each being right in their own way add another level of flavor to the story.
And then the uniqueness of the point-of-view character keep pulling me forward. It is not every day the POV dies in the first chapter. Truly an inspired twist that was never a gimmick.
But the most important thing is the characters and storytelling. The characters are all flawed, likable (but not lovable), and not in any sense of the understanding “good” guys. The story drives relentlessly forward on a trip that leaves you gasping.
I have previously read James Maxey’s superhero stories, which, while inventive, I did not like. I decided to give Mr. Maxey a second try because he writes extremely well with twists never seen before. And I glad I have. He has made a unique fantasy world; not all unicorns and butterflies, but then the series title of The Dragon Apocalypse kind-of lets you know that up front.
Greatshadow is a solid beginning to an interesting series.