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Editing Rant: The Neighbors

Erin Penn

Image courtesy of digitalart at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Previous in the story, the character talks about paying homeowner fees, before the scene where he becomes “sunlight adverse”. A temporary solution following his new condition’s onset is to put cardboard up on all the windows. He gets no reaction from the HOA even though the temporary solution ends up fairly permanent for the three weeks of the story.

Modern contemporary story. Do you have a problem with this, because I don’t believe this would happen in the real world.

The neighbors. Today I was stopped by a neighbor while I picked up my mail. This is a fairly consistent activity in my neighborhood. People are nosy, especially where they live.

If you are building a world closely related to the real world and want people to believe it, remember the neighbors.

Flash: Resolution List

Erin Penn

Rating: Mature (language)

Ryan was boxed in figuratively and literally. So much for his New Year’s resolution to stay out of trouble. How many have crashed and burned so far? Let’s see (1) Drink less – didn’t make it past the dawn; (2) Eat healthier – Wendy’s Wieners had some body-licious concession operators – the perfect place to recover from a hangover; (3) Stay out of trouble – getting crossed off now; (4) Make sure to learn names of women slept with – hence the present problem. At least he was keeping number four and five so far.

He eyed the three females at the entrance of the dead-end alley. The blonde was Kelly – at least he thought she was Kelly, maybe it was Karen – nope, pretty positive Kelly. The brunette was Genevera, a co-worker. And the Nubian queen holding his favorite T-shirt was …

Aw, fuck.

So much for resolution number four. Maybe resolution five – save money – will make it through January third.

(words 157 – originally appearing at Breathless Press 5/27/2013 for the 1/1/12 Sunday Fun – See the picture that inspired the story! – As I do not know the copyright permissions, I have not copied it here; published in new blog format 11/11/2018)

Book Review: Blood Cross (Jane Yellowrock #2)

Erin Penn

Book Cover from Amazon

Blood Cross by Faith Hunter

BOOK BLURB ON AMAZON

Jane Yellowrock is back on the prowl against the children of the night… 

The vampire council has hired skinwalker Jane Yellowrock to hunt and kill one of their own who has broken sacred ancient rules-but Jane quickly realizes that in a community that is thousands of years old, loyalties run deep…

 

MY REVIEW

A very densely written book – more short story with never-ending action. Really, really hard to find a stopping point to sleep at night.

Every page has something happen, every sentence is important, every character has a reason for being. Except the limo driver – first and only character so far in the series without anything further than he was there. A “prop” character. Blood Cross is so densely written I notice when a character didn’t get expanded.

A Compelling Read.